is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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