More tranny stories later!
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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