There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
kristin has been a bad kristin
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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