And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.