I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
time to smoke my breakfast
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
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