I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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