so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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