I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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