Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
