and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
