physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
