If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
