There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I've blown a few things in my day
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
