So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
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