How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
