My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
