I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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