Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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