and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
