I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
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