stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Randomize
