YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
dude i'm inner monologue high
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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