Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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