dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I want to fling myself into the sun
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize
