Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
