Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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