What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Woke up backwards on a recliner
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Randomize
