Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
