And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Green mimosas i think yes
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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