if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
