Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Randomize
