Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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