i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
