so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Who died my cat blue again?
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
