I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
