Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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