I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
