But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
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