i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
