What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize