I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
