i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
