I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
