From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
