Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Rumble strips road head = magical
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize