How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
My balls are so social today.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
