I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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