we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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