I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
