She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize